Updates
A chronological view of all updates and changes to tender.garden.
August 16, 2025
8 updates
Low Dopamine Morning
A Low Dopamine Morning is a morning routine that aims to minimize exposure to external stimuli and distractions. This practice is based on the insight that the amount of dopamine released immediately after waking up influences how much dopamine our brain will seek throughout the day. An important part of a Low Dopamine Morning is to avoid checking your phone or other notifications right after getting up.
Solitude
It can be a liberating process to learn to enjoy our own company and cultivating solitude as quality time with ourselves. "Solitude is for me a fount of healing which makes my life worth living." - Carl Jung "Solitude is not (just) the absence of someone or something else, but the presence of my undisturbed perception." - Sarah Diehl in Die Freiheit, allein zu sein
Idle Mode
Idle Mode can be a helpful practice when other forms of meditation feel a bit forced and structured. It can help take the pressure off. This practice helps you give yourself permission to do nothing and let your thoughts wander freely. A notebook can assist by allowing you to write down your thoughts and process whatever arises during the experience. In this way, the method is also a form of stream of consciousness writing. - Make yourself comfortable, for example with soothing music and pleasant lighting. Have a notebook and pen ready. - Sit or lie down in a comfortable position and do nothing. Just let your thoughts wander. Stare at the ceiling. - Try to tolerate boredom when it arises. Resist the urge to check your phone. - When thoughts come up, write them down without judging them too much.
Meditation
Meditation is about taking time to slow down, be present, and listen to what's going on inside and around us.
Meditation
Meditation is about taking time to slow down, be present, and listen to what's going on inside and around us.
Anger
We understand anger as an emotion that reveals underlying feelings such as pain and grief. Anger shows us that something is wrong, that we feel unseen, misunderstood, or powerless. It can also be a productive emotion, an "enough is enough" that empowers us to stand up and speak out. Anger can also lead to striking back, to more violence affecting the human organism. We strive to avoid directing our anger at individuals, and instead focus it against violent societal structures. Writing techniques like journaling and stream of consciousness writing can help with anger in various ways: - Release: It can be helpful to just let our angry voices out–without judging ourselves for them. After writing everything down, tearing up the paper can serve as an additional symbolic act of release, as explained in this post: - Need: We have found it immensely helpful to connect to the underlying need beneath the anger. Verbalizing this need has often even caused the anger to vanish at that moment, transforming into compassion. Prompt: What is the underlying need behind this emotion? - Gratitude: Gratitude journaling is a powerful tool for shifting the attention away from anger. To avoid suppressing the emotion, we recommend practicing gratitude after a first release. Being present with anger–really sitting with the emotion and giving it attention–can be a powerful act of transmutation. Where do I feel it? What thoughts are arising? By becoming curious about the emotion, we take it less personally and begin to see it from a higher vantage point.
Transmutation
Transmutation describes the process of transforming how we feel by letting our emotions flow.
Stream of Consciousness Writing
The technique stream of consciousness writing helps tap into the unconscious by writing down whatever comes to mind, ideally circumventing the conscious mind. The goal is to focus on just writing without questioning the content that is coming out. This technique can be beneficial for many things, including: - Processing emotions, for example writing about feelings of sadness or anger - Shadow work and communicating with the unconscious - Working on setting intentions and visions, like future journaling There are several things that can help with stream of consciousness writing: - Get into a relaxed state that lets you write without overthinking. For example, a form of meditation or embodiment practice can be used. - Set an intention before you start writing. This can either be part of the meditation or in a step right before writing, for example using prompts. - You can set a timer (e.g. 10 minutes) and try to keep writing until it goes off.
August 15, 2025
4 updates
Attention
External attention (like feeling desired, admired...) can lead to spiritual ego. It's important to not confuse this type of attention with connection. "What you pay attention to grows." – adrienne maree brown in Emergent Strategy "The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers." – ThÃch Nhất Hạnh - Gratitude Journaling - Awe Walk
Cancel Culture
We've dismissed the term cancel culture for a long time because we saw it mainly as a way for people who are confronted with making a mistake to evade accountability. What’s often forgotten is that the roots of this practice lie in Black liberation movements, where calling out harmful behavior publicly became a vital way to seek justice outside of systems that fail to protect marginalized communities. Over time, however, the term has been co-opted and repurposed—often by those in power—to deflect criticism. Rather than taking responsibility for the harm that was caused, people often focus on how the injustice is communicated. This shifts the attention away from the root of the issue. We believe it's crucial to listen to people experiencing violence and injustice, no matter how it is delivered. There should always be space for righteous anger. However, recently, we started reflecting on our own behavior, how punishment is ingrained in our culture and how this leads to judgment and finger pointing in cases where more effective conflict resolution could be possible. When we focus too much on outer spheres and neglect the necessary inner work, this can lead to externalization and cancel culture.
Morning Routine
A morning routine can be helpful to start the day with intention.
Conflict Resolution
From being against each other to being with each other. Successful conflict resolution strengthens trust that future conflicts can also be resolved well.
August 9, 2025
2 updates
Presence
Being in the now. Not moving between past and future times in our head, but being 100% present in the current moment. - Meditation - Creative expression, e.g. drawing - Movement, e.g. dancing - Cutting off outside noise, e.g. through Low Dopamine Mornings - Deep Listening <Image src="/img/presence-depth.jpg" width="1280" height="956"
Book: Nonviolent Communication - A Language of Life
This book by Marshall B. Rosenberg describes Nonviolent Communication (NVC) as philosophy and method. Nonviolent Communication is a process with the goal to focus our attention on four pieces of information: "First, we observe what is actually happening in a situation: what are we observing others saying or doing that is either enriching or not enriching our life?" "The trick is to be able to articulate this observation without introducing any judgment or evaluation–to simply say what people are doing that we either like or don't like." "Next, we state how we feel when we observe this action: are we hurt, scared, joyful, amused, irritated?"
August 8, 2025
2 updates
Attachment Theory
Attachment theory was coined by John Bowlby and aims to describe how the support and attention we get from our caretakers as children affects our behavior in relationships and conflicts as adults.
Book: Polysecure
Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern is "the first book to explicitly translate the principles of attachment theory to nonmonogamous relationships." "Again and again, I have experienced the power of love to heal, to bridge, to connect and to awaken, as well as the trauma that ensues in its absence." "In many ways, my life is centered in not just believing in love, but being love. That is, emanating love as best as I can, moment by moment, interaction by interaction." "Attachment theory offers an important–even revolutionary–framework for understanding the biological and psychological necessity of being securely bonded to others." "Many people who practice ethical nonmonogamy (who often proudly describe themselves as relationship geeks) have been drawn to attachment theory as a way to further enhance their general knowledge about relationships." The book first explains the concept of attachment theory, how children look for their caretakers when their nervous system is imbalanced and how receiving support impacts not only their wellbeing, but also their ability to go on independent exploration. "As human infants, we are born into this world with an attachment system that wires us to expect connection with others. The creator of attachment theory, John Bowlby, called this innate expectation the attachment behavioral system and explained that it is one of several behavioral systems that humans evolved to ensure our survival." "As infants, we can't meet any of our needs. So, in order to survive, we have to bond and attach to caretakers who can provide us with food and shelter, as well as meeting our biological and psychological needs for emotional attunement, warm responsiveness and calming physical touch." "When an infant feels fear, distress or discomfort, their attachment system is activated. This prompts them to quickly turn towards their caretakers or use proximity-seeking behaviors such as crying, reaching for, calling out or, later, crawling and following their attachment figure." "If the child receives the support, reassurance and comfort they need from their caretaker, their nervous system then returns to a state of calm homeostasis."
August 7, 2025
2 updates
Report: Repression of Palestine Solidarity in Germany
The report "Repression of Palestine Solidarity in Germany" was published in July 2025. It documents the heavy repression Palestinians and people in solidarity with Palestine face in Germany, especially when protesting against the genocide. "This report aims to analyze the multi-layered repression of Palestinian activism and Palestine solidarity in Germany. It identifies five interrelated arenas through which this repression is enacted: legal repression, state violence and securitization, discursive delegitimization, censorship in the cultural and civic sector, and exclusion within the educational system."
Gaza Genocide
While the word genocide was largely being suppressed by Western media until 2025, a growing number of genocide scholars and human rights experts are getting increasingly clear: - The International Association of Genocide Scholars declared that "Israel’s policies and actions in Gaza meet the legal definition of genocide in Article II of the United Nations Convention for the Prevention and Punishment of the Crime of Genocide." - United Nations Special Rapporteur on the situation of human rights in the Palestinian territories occupied since 1967, Francesca Albanese calls Israel a settler-colonial project and highlights corporations who "have profited from Israel’s economy of illegal occupation, apartheid and now, genocide." - Amnesty International concludes "Israel is committing genocide against Palestinians in Gaza." - Human Rights Watch published a report in December 2024 titled "Extermination and Acts of Genocide." - Omer Bartov, professor of Holocaust and genocide studies at Brown University, wrote a piece in NYT called I’m a Genocide Scholar. I Know It When I See It.: "My inescapable conclusion has become that Israel is committing genocide against the Palestinian people. Having grown up in a Zionist home, lived the first half of my life in Israel, served in the I.D.F. as a soldier and officer and spent most of my career researching and writing on war crimes and the Holocaust, this was a painful conclusion to reach, and one that I resisted as long as I could. But I have been teaching classes on genocide for a quarter of a century. I can recognize one when I see one." Israeli military officials told the New York Times that there is no proof that Hamas has been systematically stealing aid that was supposed to go to the people in Gaza. "It's not our fault. Hamas is stealing the food" is a lie that has been used heavily over the last 2 years to justify Israel's deliberate starvation of Palestinians.
August 6, 2025
2 updates
Attention
External attention (like feeling desired, admired...) can lead to spiritual ego. It's important to not confuse this type of attention with connection. "What you pay attention to grows." – adrienne maree brown in Emergent Strategy "The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers." – ThÃch Nhất Hạnh - Gratitude Journaling - Awe Walk
Book: Connect
"Connect: Building Exceptional Relationships with Family, Friends & Colleagues" is a book by Carole Robin and David Bradford based on a Stanford MBA course that the authors teach. Carole and David provide actionable advice and stories about exceptional relationships, which they describe as: "you feel seen, known, and appreciated for who you really are, not an edited version of yourself" "think of exceptional relationships as living, breathing organisms that are always changing, always in need of tending, and always always capable of taking your breath away" "When your interactions with another person are at their most authentic, there is a paradigm shift." - "You can be more fully yourself, and so can the other person" - "Both of you are willing to be vulnerable" - "You trust that self-disclosures will not be used against you" - "You can be honest with each other" - "You deal with conflict productively"