Updates
A chronological view of all updates and changes to tender.garden.
August 18, 2025
8 updates
Article Series: Because We Need Each Other
"Because We Need Each Other: Conversations on Cancel Culture" is an article series by Erika Sasson, Celia Kutz, Kazu Haga, and Shilpa Jain that was published on The Forge and Convergence. You can access the full series here. Find the article here "This first article shares our origin story. We were all part of a gathering called “Because We Need Each Other,” in which 25 people from across the US came together to grapple with the impacts of a punitive pattern in social change/movement left spaces." The authors share the motivation for the gathering and the importance of improving the ways we collaborate in movement spaces. "Given the profound political moment we are in—with the unraveling of many democratic rights and freedoms—it feels more important than ever to strengthen the ways in which we come together on the left" "Our capacity to mobilize is strengthened by our ability to work through disagreement and come back from conflict." They also share important insights from the gathering: "The key takeaway from our gathering—beyond any discrete action steps—was the power of airing our questions in a trusted environment." "Because we need each other, we understand that we also need worldviews that reflect and commit to wholesome, spiritual practices in our movement spaces. We came together to remember, in the important words of one of our beloved Indigenous elders, that we are all cousins. And that we want to continue treating each other as relatives in our work and communities as we go forward in these times."
Article: Damien Echols on Spiritual Ego
On his Patreon, Damien Echols published an article called The Shadow Fed by Light: How Magick Can Inflate the Ego. This phenomenon is often called spiritual ego. "power—real power—doesn’t just amplify the sacred. It amplifies everything" "Magick doesn’t discriminate. It’s not a moral force. It’s a tool. And when you pull in chi, or spiritus, or call down a planetary current, it doesn’t just fill the parts of you that you want to grow. It fills all of you. Every chamber. Every crack." "The energy doesn’t lie. It just flows. And if you’re not aware of the structures it’s pouring into, you may be reinforcing the very illusions you’re trying to transcend." "You’ll notice this in subtle ways at first. A little more self-importance. A sharper edge to your online posts. The creeping belief that you’re further along than others." "No one makes it far in magick without eventually encountering this shadow. And the ones who do make it far? They’re the ones who learn to bow. Not to external gods, but to the Work itself. They understand that the more power you channel, the more responsibility you carry—not just in the world, but within yourself." "That’s why grounding practices—zazen, martial arts, daily service, kaizen—aren’t optional." "And more than anything, that’s why watching yourself is part of the path. Notice your tone. Your impulse to correct. The part of you that feels insulted when someone doesn’t recognize your insight. These aren’t flaws to be ashamed of—they’re signals. They show you where the energy is leaking into ego instead of soul." "The more energy you gather, the more discipline you need to hold it. And not just discipline of action, but discipline of identity. Because if you let the ego grab hold of the power, it’ll hijack the whole operation. You’ll still be practicing. You’ll still be invoking. But you’ll be doing it for the wrong self."
Judgment
Judging ourselves and others is often related to binary thinking of right or wrong, good or bad. As long as we judge ourselves for our mistakes, we also judge others. Fear of judgment is holding us back. "One kind of life-alienating communication is the use of moralistic judgments that imply wrongness or badness on the part of people who don't act in harmony with our values." – Marshall B. Rosenberg in Nonviolent Communication "Blame, insults, put-downs, labels, criticism, comparisons, and diagnoses are all forms of judgment." – Marshall B. Rosenberg in Nonviolent Communication
Punishment
A society that reponds to failures in the form of blame and punishment leads to a high amount of fear of punishment and thus denying mistakes instead of taking responsibility. "It does not surprise me to hear that there is considerably less violence in cultures where people think in terms of human needs than in cultures where people label one another as 'good' or 'bad' and believe that the 'bad' ones deserve to be punished." – Marshall B. Rosenberg in Nonviolent Communication "I believe it is in everyone's interest that people change, not in order to avoid punishment, but because they see the change as benefiting themselves." – Marshall B. Rosenberg in Nonviolent Communication
Article: Damien Echols on the Philosopher's Stone
On his Patreon, Damien Echols published an article called What is the Philosopher's Stone?. It is about how The Philosopher’s Stone, a legendary symbol in Western esotericism, is not a physical object. It is presence itself: a crystallized state of conscious awareness in the present moment. Damien writes about how in medieval alchemy, the Philosopher’s Stone was believed to transmute lead into gold, heal all disease, grant immortality, illuminate the soul, and unite all opposites. And then he reveals that the Stone isn't what most people believe: "The Stone isn’t found in a flask or forged in a furnace. The Stone is presence." "It’s what happens when your awareness crystallizes. When your consciousness becomes so rooted in the moment, so refined by practice and discipline, that it no longer breaks apart under pressure. When it stops being scattered across past and future, and settles completely—entirely—into now." Damien goes on to explain how all the believed powers of the Stone are a metaphor for presence. "But here's the truth: you don’t need a laboratory to perform transmutation. You only need attention. Focused, disciplined, unwavering presence." "Sit with your anger without flinching, and it becomes insight. Sit with your grief long enough, and it ripens into compassion.
Book: Nonviolent Communication - A Language of Life
This book by Marshall B. Rosenberg describes Nonviolent Communication (NVC) as philosophy and method. Nonviolent Communication is a process with the goal to focus our attention on four pieces of information: "First, we observe what is actually happening in a situation: what are we observing others saying or doing that is either enriching or not enriching our life?" "The trick is to be able to articulate this observation without introducing any judgment or evaluation–to simply say what people are doing that we either like or don't like." "Next, we state how we feel when we observe this action: are we hurt, scared, joyful, amused, irritated?"
Safe(r) Space
A Safe Space is a space where the goal is for people to feel safe, respected, and free from fear of violence or judgment. It provides a protected environment that fosters openness, vulnerability, and mutual understanding. It is also often referred to as a Safer Space to emphasize that no space is completely free from violence and discrimination–and to show the intention to make the space progressively safer over time. See also: Brave(r) Space The safer we feel in a space, the freer and more vulnerable we can be there. For us, conflicts usually show how safe we feel in a space: when harm occurs, we strive for all involved to take responsibility, learn from the situation, and find ways to interact with more understanding and compassion in the future. If this does not happen, if conflicts are swept under the rug, it can result in the space feeling less safe. We share less of what’s going on inside us because we fear further hurt. For us, there are three ways to handle such situations: - Conflict Resolution: The attempt to repair, resolve conflicts, and create a space where all involved feel safer again. - Adaptation: If this doesn’t work (e.g., because involved parties are unwilling to engage in conflict resolution at the moment), we need to adjust our behavior. We show ourselves less freely and vulnerably to prevent hurt. - Distance: We decide whether to continue staying in a space or if we would have to adapt so much that it makes more sense to keep our distance for the time being.
Violence
Many societal problems are based on disagreement about what counts as violence. Physical violence is easier to recognize than psychological violence. "It does not surprise me to hear that there is considerably less violence in cultures where people think in terms of human needs than in cultures where people label one another as 'good' or 'bad' and believe that the 'bad' ones deserve to be punished." – Marshall B. Rosenberg in Nonviolent Communication
August 16, 2025
11 updates
Love Journaling
As part of my morning routine I started doing gratitude journaling more regularly. Pia inspired me to do this practice at the beginning of 2024 (based on a post by Lida Pavlova), but I hadn't found the right way to integrate it into my daily life until earlier this year. Now, I keep a notebook dedicated to this next to my bedside, and I try to fill a page after waking up. Usually, I start sentences like this: - "I'm grateful for..."
Love
"The word 'love' is most often defined as a noun, yet all the more astute theorists of love acknowledge that we would all love better if we used it as a verb." – bell hooks in All About Love "To begin by always thinking of love as an action rather than a feeling is one way in which anyone using the word in this manner automatically assumes accountability and responsibility." – bell hooks in All About Love
Gratitude Journaling
Gratitude journaling is a type of journaling that focuses on regularly writing down things we’re thankful for. By noticing and recording even small moments of joy, connection, or beauty, we train our attention toward what’s working rather than what’s lacking. Over time, this light work practice can shift our perception and deepen appreciation for everyday life. On a sheet of paper, write down things you're grateful for, starting sentences like this: - "I love..." - "I love, when..." - "I'm grateful for..." - "I'm grateful, that..." We recommend using explicit examples that help really feel the gratitude. For example, instead of "I love nature" you could write down "I love how the forest smells on a beautiful summer day." - Medium: Gratitude journaling can be used as part of a larger journaling practice (for example in Life Beyond Suffering) or in a dedicated space. We both use a dedicated journal for gratitude.
Low Dopamine Morning
A Low Dopamine Morning is a morning routine that aims to minimize exposure to external stimuli and distractions. This practice is based on the insight that the amount of dopamine released immediately after waking up influences how much dopamine our brain will seek throughout the day. An important part of a Low Dopamine Morning is to avoid checking your phone or other notifications right after getting up.
Solitude
It can be a liberating process to learn to enjoy our own company and cultivating solitude as quality time with ourselves. "Solitude is for me a fount of healing which makes my life worth living." - Carl Jung "Solitude is not (just) the absence of someone or something else, but the presence of my undisturbed perception." - Sarah Diehl in Die Freiheit, allein zu sein
Idle Mode
Idle Mode can be a helpful practice when other forms of meditation feel a bit forced and structured. It can help take the pressure off. This practice helps you give yourself permission to do nothing and let your thoughts wander freely. A notebook can assist by allowing you to write down your thoughts and process whatever arises during the experience. In this way, the method is also a form of stream of consciousness writing. - Make yourself comfortable, for example with soothing music and pleasant lighting. Have a notebook and pen ready. - Sit or lie down in a comfortable position and do nothing. Just let your thoughts wander. Stare at the ceiling. - Try to tolerate boredom when it arises. Resist the urge to check your phone. - When thoughts come up, write them down without judging them too much.
Meditation
Meditation is about taking time to slow down, be present, and listen to what's going on inside and around us.
Meditation
Meditation is about taking time to slow down, be present, and listen to what's going on inside and around us.
Anger
We understand anger as an emotion that reveals underlying feelings such as pain and grief. Anger shows us that something is wrong, that we feel unseen, misunderstood, or powerless. It can also be a productive emotion, an "enough is enough" that empowers us to stand up and speak out. Anger can also lead to striking back, to more violence affecting the human organism. We strive to avoid directing our anger at individuals, and instead focus it against violent societal structures. Writing techniques like journaling and stream of consciousness writing can help with anger in various ways: - Release: It can be helpful to just let our angry voices out–without judging ourselves for them. After writing everything down, tearing up the paper can serve as an additional symbolic act of release, as explained in this post: - Need: We have found it immensely helpful to connect to the underlying need beneath the anger. Verbalizing this need has often even caused the anger to vanish at that moment, transforming into compassion. Prompt: What is the underlying need behind this emotion? - Gratitude: Gratitude journaling is a powerful tool for shifting the attention away from anger. To avoid suppressing the emotion, we recommend practicing gratitude after a first release. Being present with anger–really sitting with the emotion and giving it attention–can be a powerful act of transmutation. Where do I feel it? What thoughts are arising? By becoming curious about the emotion, we take it less personally and begin to see it from a higher vantage point.
Transmutation
Transmutation describes the process of transforming how we feel by letting our emotions flow.
Stream of Consciousness Writing
The technique stream of consciousness writing helps tap into the unconscious by writing down whatever comes to mind, ideally circumventing the conscious mind. The goal is to focus on just writing without questioning the content that is coming out. This technique can be beneficial for many things, including: - Processing emotions, for example writing about feelings of sadness or anger - Shadow work and communicating with the unconscious - Working on setting intentions and visions, like future journaling There are several things that can help with stream of consciousness writing: - Get into a relaxed state that lets you write without overthinking. For example, a form of meditation or embodiment practice can be used. - Set an intention before you start writing. This can either be part of the meditation or in a step right before writing, for example using prompts. - You can set a timer (e.g. 10 minutes) and try to keep writing until it goes off.