Updates
A chronological view of all updates and changes to tender.garden.
September 26, 2025
5 updates
Journaling
Journaling can be a helpful practice for recognizing patterns. - Finding the right medium: Try out different methods to see which one presents the least resistance and is most sustainable in the long term. Do I prefer writing by hand in a notebook, typing on my phone or laptop (e.g., using a tool like Obsidian), or does it work better for me to express my thoughts and emotions through drawings or voice memos? - Structured data: It can be helpful to track some things in a more structured way. For example: What was the weather like that day? What did I consume? What rituals did I perform? - Perspective and depth: Your perspective can evolve over time. What might start as "What did I do that day?" (external view) can deepen into "What was on my mind that day?" (internal view). - States of consciousness: Through which different states did I go? How much was I present, how much did I spend in other time states? There are different types of journaling, for example: - Free-form, for example using stream of consciousness writing - Guided, for example using prompts - Focused on a certain topic, for example gratitude journaling
Collective Liberation
"Nobody's free until everybody's free." – Fannie Lou Hamer The term collective liberation describes the notion that everyone suffers under oppressive structures. Contributing to liberation means taking responsibility in different areas of life. For example, it is important to find the right balance in the type of work: - Shadow Work: Actively work on recognizing and dismantling oppressive power structures. - Light Work: Actively work on building a world based on mutual trust and care. "Nobody's free until everybody's free." – Fannie Lou Hamer "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly."
Responsibility
To us, taking responsibility means recognizing which aspects of life we can truly influence and control. It's a practice of inner alignment and sovereignty. It also means leaving space for other people to take responsibility for their own choices and behaviors. We're realizing more and more that we can't make others act a certain way. We can't control anyone, and we shouldn't want to. Through shadow work, we learn how our unconscious patterns ripple into the collective. Taking responsibility then means practicing accountability when we're confronted with harm we may have caused.
Transmute / Rage Letter
At the end of June, I decided that I wanted to “step back for the weekend” to let some emotions flow and process things I’ve been suppressing. What started as a weekend turned into the entire month of July. I realized I needed more space than I had thought because I felt both burnt out and restless at the same time. During this month, I went through many phases I still want to process in writing. Today, I want to tell you about my rage letter. At the end of July, I took a week off and decided to explicitly allow my emotions to flow again. On Tuesday morning, I started with a breathwork exercise I learned in a workshop with Carla. The psychedelic effect of this exercise continues to surprise me: it usually stirs up a lot of emotions that have accumulated in my body, and I need a few days to let them flow through me. Afterward, I feel clearer and freer. Tuesday and Wednesday, I spent my days in the forest and by the lake. I went alone, sat by the water, then retreated to the woods to soak in the nature and meditate. All with as little phone time or other activities as possible. And wow, did I feel awful at times. Just sitting there, feeling bad, and accepting it without distracting myself was hard to bear. Thankfully, I managed to remind myself now and then that I was doing this intentionally, that it was normal to feel this way, and that these feelings needed to flow through me. This allowed me to observe my emotions from a distance and not take every negative thought associated with them seriously. And somehow, even though I didn’t feel good, it became a deeply beautiful experience—one I remember fondly and consider one of the most impactful of the year. All my life, I’ve been so afraid of "negative" emotions that I’ve always focused on getting rid of them quickly. Now I’m slowly learning that every emotion has its place, and that it can be an incredibly raw and beautiful experience to give space to a feeling I've resisted for so long. Those days were both shitty and sacred. On Wednesday evening, I walked through the city looking for something to eat. Somehow, I got frustrated—nothing was going right. On my way home, I was suddenly overtaken by anger. I was furious at this "stupid vacation," at "just sitting around feeling bad." Suddenly, I was mad at all sorts of things that bubbled up. Luckily, after some time I could remind myself again that it was okay for these emotions to surface, that this was an opportunity to release them. So I marched home (angrily!), sat down in my room, turned on some music, and wrote a rage letter for an hour. I just wrote nonstop, without pausing or questioning. This method is also called stream of consciousness writing. I wanted to write something no one would ever read, giving myself the freedom to say things I'd never otherwise say. Later, I could barely read any of it because it was so scribbled. The words fucking and shit appeared very often.
Dealing with Jealousy
Here are a few coping strategies I observed when dealing with my own jealousy. There is no „one best way“, which strategy I’m using depends on a lot of circumstances and how much willpower I have in that moment to push through the discomfort. When I’m not in a good state and there are topics that easily trigger me, it is tempting to ignore things, letting your partner know you don’t want to hear about certain topics. While this can be a valid strategy, for me personally, this hasn’t led to more secure relationships in the past because it discourages vulnerability and transparency.
September 17, 2025
3 updates
Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha
Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha is a Tibetan Buddhist mantra used to invoke Buddha Yellow Dzambhala, who stands for prosperity, generosity, and wealth. Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha has helped us a lot with being more present during walks and experiences in nature. It helps us see and appreciate the abundance and depth that we already have in our lives. - We often listen to this version on YouTube.
Pygmalion Effect
The Pygmalion Effect says that trust can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. When we assume good intent and see people with loving eyes, we also get more positive reactions in return. By taking responsibility for our inner state and how we see others, we change how the world interacts with us. ✨ Trust is magic ✨ Opposite: Golem Effect "If you trust the people, they become trustworthy." – adrienne maree brown in Emergent Strategy
Awe Walk
In his book Awe, Dacher Keltner describes an exercise called the awe walk. It is a form of walking meditation with the goal to evoke and deepen the feeling of awe by embracing nature and surroundings. Go on a walk and: - Try to see your surroundings with fresh eyes (feel, hear, smell...), as if you were a child discovering the world for the first time, cultivating a childlike sense of wonder. - Take new paths and expose yourself to new stimuli. If you walk in the same location, make it a goal to discover something new each time, something you haven’t noticed before. We've also had great effects when combining the walk with singing a mantra, especially Om Dzambhala Dzalendhraye Soha. For a study, researchers sent two groups of people on regular walks over the course of eight weeks. One group was assigned to do awe walks, while the control group received no special instructions—they were simply told to walk. In Awe, Keltner highlights three effects observed in the study: - The more often people went on awe walks, the more awe they felt over time. Awe is an emotion that can be cultivated through practice and experienced more deeply with repetition. - The more awe participants experienced, the less anxiety and depression they reported in daily life. They also reported greater life satisfaction. - Participants were asked to take selfies after each walk. Over time, in the awe walk group, their faces became smaller in proportion to their surroundings in the photos, whereas this ratio remained unchanged in the control group.
September 16, 2025
7 updates
Mantra
A mantra is a sound, word, or phrase that is repeated over and over through humming, speaking, chanting, or singing. There are different ways to work with a mantra: - Many spiritual lineages work with mantras that come from long traditions and carry a lot of meaning in them. See examples below. - You can also craft your own mantra by choosing an affirmation that you would like to focus your mind on. "The word 'mantra' means 'mind-protecting.' A mantra is something that protects the mind from itself, really, by giving it some fodder other than the thinking process." – Ram Dass in Paths to God "As you chant, start to surrender into it, start to offer up all of your other thoughts as sacrifice into it." – Ram Dass in Paths to God - Om Mani Padme Hum - Om Ami Dewa Hrih
Om Ami Dewa Hrih
Om Ami Dewa Hrih is a Tibetan Buddhist mantra used to invoke Buddha Amitabha. - We often listen to this version on YouTube.
Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha
Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha is a Tibetan Buddhist mantra used to invoke Buddha Yellow Dzambhala, who stands for prosperity, generosity, and wealth. Om Dzambhala Zalendhraye Soha has helped us a lot with being more present during walks and experiences in nature. It helps us see and appreciate the abundance and depth that we already have in our lives. - We often listen to this version on YouTube.
Om Mani Padme Hum
Om Mani Padme Hum is a Tibetan Buddhist mantra that can be translated to "the jewel in the lotus," symbolizing the union of wisdom and compassion. The mantra is associated with Avalokiteshvara, the Bodhisattva of Compassion. - We listen a lot to this version on Spotify
Affirmations
Affirmations are short, positive statements that help reframe thoughts and reinforce desired beliefs and intentions. By repeating them regularly, we can affect how our consciousness perceives ourselves and the world around us. Since affirmations are typically used to shift thoughts and perceptions toward positive outcomes, they can be seen as a light work technique. - Choose an affirmation that reflects a belief, intention, or quality you want to strengthen - Keep it short, present-tense, and positive (e.g., “I am a source of calm, strength, and hope.”) - Repeat it regularly It is even possible to create a mantra out of your affirmation and repeat it over and over to focus your mind on it even more. Affirmations are not inly relevant on the individual level. We believe it's very important for the collective to use them to envision a better future. May our affirmations be as bold as our imagination allows. Examples:
Book: Life Beyond Suffering
The book Life Beyond Suffering: A Guided Practice by Kinzer MB is a 60 day workbook with the following elements for each day: - Guided writing practice - Write down things you're grateful for
Book: Paths to God
Paths to God: Living the Bhagavad Gita by Ram Dass is a spiritual guide that bridges Eastern philosophy and Western thought, offering accessible reflections on the Bhagavad Gita for those seeking spiritual depth, personal growth, and a deeper connection to the divine. On finding your way, trusting what draws you, letting go, and staying open to the next step: "It doesn't really matter which next thing you do, because whatever it is, it will become your next teaching. And it isn't the thing you do that matters, anyway–it's who it is that's doing it, where it's coming from in you." "Don't be afraid to change when your intuitive wisdom tells you to. You start a sadhana, and you go into it with total commitment, and you drink deeply of it. But then you begin to experience its limitations for you." "Work with whatever it is that's drawing you at the moment." "At one moment, You'll sit by the river, and you'll look at a rock, and you'll feel its sacredness, and that will take you out of yourself. At another moment, nature won't do it for you, but something else will." "At one moment, one form feels comfortable, right, useful; at another moment, another form. Just keep flowing in and out of the forms. Use them and then drop them. They aren't 'it.' The point isn't to cling to one practice or another, one teacher or another; the point is to use whatever can in this moment open you to living spirit." "We keep thinking that we have to get behind ourselves and push, when all the time we are actually being propelled full speed ahead." On mantra: "The word 'mantra' means 'mind-protecting.' A mantra is something that protects the mind from itself, really, by giving it some fodder other than the thinking process."
September 3, 2025
3 updates
Cord Cutting Meditation
This meditation from the book Ritual by Lorri Davis and Damien Echols helps cut energetic cords of attachment. It supports us in acting according to what feels right in the present moment and in letting go of unhealthy attachments, desires, and expectations. We recommend practicing this regularly as a form of energetic cleansing, for example as part of a morning routine. - Find a comfortable position and relax with a few deep breaths or a short meditation. - When you feel calm, call upon Archangel Michael, represented by a shining, powerful red light carrying a sword. - Say: "Please cut all my energetic cords that I have formed to other people, places, situations, to future dreams, and to the past. And all energetic cords that other people have formed to me. Free me from all my attachments, free us all. Thank you." 🙏 - Visualize Michael using the sword to cut through all energetic connections around you, on each side of your body. Notice any memories or associations that arise during the cutting, and gently let them go. - Close by saying: "I am free. I am free. I am not dependent on anyone. Everything I need, I find within myself. I go with the flow, I trust in the Universe. Thank you, Michael."
Grounding Meditation
This type of meditation helps with grounding, getting more centered and back into presence.
Vacuum Grounding Meditation
This grounding meditation is called Wet Vac in the book Ritual by Lorri Davis and Damien Echols. It offers a very helpful visualization to vacuum away any kind of energetic and emotional debris that has been accumulating over the day. - Bring yourself into a comfortable position and relax with a few deep breaths. You can either stand, sit, or lie down. - Visualize the floor below you opening up to reveal a hole. This is the end of a hose that extends all the way to the center of the Earth, where a powerful vacuum awaits. Feel the strong energetic pull as the hose connects to your energy field.